Seven reasons not to mess with children.
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow
human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a
human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, “When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah”.
The teacher asked, “What if Jonah went to hell?”
The little girl replied, “Then you ask him”.
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while
they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked
what the drawing was.
The girl replied, “I’m drawing God.”
The teacher paused and said, “But no one knows what God looks like.”
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl
replied, “They will in a minute.”
A Sunday school teacherwas discussing thewith her
five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to “honor” thy Father and thy
she asked, “Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our
brothers and sisters?”
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family)
answered, “Thou shall not kill.”
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the
at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had
strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, “Why are some of
your hairs white, Mom?”
Her mother replied, “Well, every time that you do something wrong and
make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.”
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then
said, “Momma, how come ALL of grandma’s hairs are white?”
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to
persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
“Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown
up and say,’There’s Jennifer, she’s a lawyer,’ or ‘That’s Michael,
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, “And there’s the
teacher, she’s dead.”
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying
to make the matter clearer, she said, “Now, class, if I stood on my
the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in
“Yes,” the class said.
“Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary
position the blood doesn’t run into my feet?”
A little fellow shouted, “Cause your feet ain’t empty.”
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary
school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of
The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
“Take only ONE. God is watching.”
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table
a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, “Take all you want. God is watching the
Sunday Setlist for House of Worship and Ministries
Things were a little different this morning. Our pianist had her baby on Thursday so she was out and our drummer was out. Lucky for us, our worship leader’s mother-in-law was visting and she played for us. I was a little concerned when she looked at the set list and made the comment that she did not know any of these songs but she did a great job. Our leader’s 12 year old filled in on the drums. He is going to be amazing in a few years.
I am Free-Newsboys
O Praise Him-David Crowder
God of Wonders-Marc Byrd/Steve Hindalong
Here I Am to Worship-Tim Hughes
You Are Good-Israel Houghton
Free to Worship-Eddie James
Awesome God-Rich Mullins
This is part of Sunday Setlist
This is the prayer of my heart today.
Tonight I am heavy hearted. I love the work I do but there are days that it realy emotions just couldn’t make sense of it. Today was a day that I questioned why evil is allowed to run rampant in this world. Today was a day that I wondered why children had to suffer for the sins of someone else. I know God is good and I know God is in control but these are the days that I can’t make it all make sense. The good thing is, God knows my heart and my heavy heartedness and while these questions may never be answered here on earth, I know that one day I will understand it all.This is an old song but it has been rolling around in my head all night.
Last week some friends and I met to eat dinner at one of our favorite mexican restaurants. I got there late because I had to deal with some children before I could go. The waitress brought our food and set it on the table and before we could eat, one of my friends very calmly said there was a roach on our table. At that point we jumped up and scrambled. One of my friends jumped on top of the booth and finally Lindsay decided to kill the roach. We all just stood there looking at each other trying to decide what to do. We were starving so we decided to move to another table. We managed to eat our food and later laughed about it. The thing is, roaches or palmetto bugs as they are sometimes called, are very common around these parts. Most people associate roaches with filth but down here, they show up in the most immaculate of places. I guess that is why we were not so hard on the manager. He did cut us a break so it ended up all good. Plus I got to spend time with some of my most favorite people in the world!
Sunday Setlist for House of Worship and Ministries Jesup, Ga
This Sunday was a special Sunday. We have a family in our church that puts on a rodeo every year in Screven, Ga and our church has played a big role in the rodoe for the past few years. Our pastor has been doing Cowboy Church with the cowboys and cowgirls for the pst few years and this year, he got to have church with the whole areana. There was probably close to 2,000 people there Friday and Saturday night combined. What a forum to be able to share the gospel. Today was Cowboy Sunday and we were able to have the cowboys come to our church. Our music was a little different today and we went really old school on some songs. The best part was that there were several people today and throughout the weekend that gave their lives to Christ. What a great ministry to get involved in!
Friend of God-Israel Houghton
Yes, God is Real-Titus Pollard
How Great Thou Art-Carl Boberg/R.J. Hughes
Until Then-Stuart Hamblen
Come, Now is the Time to Worship-Brian Doerksen
He is Wonderful-Unknown
Revelation Song-Gateway Worship
Jesus, Lover of My Soul-Darlene Zschech
You Are Good-Isreal Houghton
This is in conjunction with the Sunday Setlist.
Every year there are some people in our church who put on a rodeo. It started out as a small venue but over the past 10 years, it has become a rather large event in this area. Today, we had 1400 elementary kids from all over the county show up to see some of what they do at the rodeo. There was bull riding, team roping, and barrel racing. The kids loved it. Our pastor and Mr. Harry MC’d the event and they even gave the kids a free ticket in hopes that these kids will bring their parents out on Friday and Saturday night. You see, this is not your average rodeo. This rodeo is evangelistic in nature. We have a gospel sing and this year, our pastor is going to hold Cowboy Church in the areana for everyone to hear. There will literally be thousands of people who will have the opportunity to hear the Gospel.
My job today was to help put together bag lunches for the kids. We busily put hotdogs, and chips, and fruit in a paper bag for the kids to have for lunch. After all the lunches were passed out and the kids were fed and on their way back to school, our pastor was talking to those of us who had volunteered to help and he made the comment that we had an opportunity to minister to 1400 kids today and hopefully the eternity of some of these kids was impacted. It seemed so small in the whole scheme of things but I am humbled to have been apart of being able to do something that will have a lasting affect.